Hodge-podge

Weigh-in day

I gained a pound but I expected it so I’m not all down about it. I’m getting back on the wagon this week, so from here on out it’s positive thinking, eating right and working my ass off—literally. I’m going to take it one day at a time and not throw in the towel because of little setbacks. One day of bad eating shouldn’t turn into the rest of the week because hey, I already blew it anyway.

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Dating in the Dark

I’m probably one of the few people in America who actually watches this show but I like watching mindless trash. And I especially like watching shows that I can picture myself in the situation of the people appearing in them. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the show, the premise is three guys and three girls live in a house and go on “dates” in one room of the house which is completely dark. They can’t see anything, nothing , nada. So, here are a few thoughts on the show:

• I don’t think this would ever work for me. First, there is no way that I would get all touchy feely after such a short time. But these people are all into the touching and making out. Second, I don’t think looks are everything, but if you’re not a looker I need to see you while I’m getting to know you so it’s not such a shock and your looks can grow on me.

• I love their facial expressions when they get the first look at who they’ve been getting cozy with. The other person can’t see it and it’s usually written all over their face if they were hoping for or picturing someone much hotter.
• Last night the guys and girls got to go through each other’s suitcases. The guys pull out a pair of pants belonging to one of the girls and one says, “Size four. That’s good! That means she’s curvy.” Seriously? Size four? Curvy?

• I liked that one of the guys decided to continue dating a girl that he had a great connection with even though she wasn’t his “type”—blonde and petite.

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Dating in Real Life

I’m not sure if it’s me or if there are just really mostly losers out there. I finally heard from one of the men I “winked” at again, the one who I played phone tag with last week. He called twice on Sunday. I knew I wasn’t really into his voice but figured he can’t help. Just like I can’t help that my voice is slightly deeper than most women, or so I’ve been told. 3T’s husband likes to call me Barry White, but for the record, it’s not that bad. I’ve never been mistaken for a man, not even on the phone.

So anyway, I let both calls go to voicemail but returned his call yesterday. And his voice was even worse than on the message. So bad that I thought I had the wrong number. And after talking to him I’m questioning his sexual preference. I cut the conversation off when he asked, “What would it take for you to come out and play?” Gag.

—TOL

Hey, gurrrl! What's your name?

Why is it that guys who you would like to show interest in you don’t but the random guys (garbage man, janitor, guy with gold teeth pulling fives kids behind him) do. What gives these guys the balls to say hello and the others not?

Now, I’m not saying I’m the kind of girl who gets all offended by cat calls, I’m totally not. I’ll take positive attention anywhere I can get it. Plus, my mom told me that it doesn’t last forever so enjoy it while it lasts and work your shit. Ha! OK, I added in the work your shit part but I know that’s what she meant you get the point.

So anyway, I’ll use last night as an example. I went with 3T and her crew to see the Washington Mystics play at the Verizon Center. (You can check out how it was here.) I was “acknowledged” by the METRO train driver, and a couple losers men at the stadium both who may or may not have had gold teeth, but one definitely was holding a young child.

I was also fully expecting to get hit on by at least one woman because one, the Mystics are a WNBA team and women athletic teams sometimes draw women who love women to them. And two, if it was going to happen to either me or 3T the stars would align and it would be me. But that didn’t happen either.

The thing is that while on the train there were at least two nicely dressed professional looking males, who weren’t wearing wedding bands, in close proximity to us. I would have welcomed conversation from either. But these guys didn’t even give me a glance. What’s up with that? I feel like the guys that I consider worthwhile are probably considered worthwhile by plenty of women so they can have their pick of the litter. And more and more woman are becoming leg-spreading whores overly agressive allowing men to sit back and not put forth any effort.

In online dating I’m noticing that men actually seem like they want me to chase them.

And, I. Will. Not.

The closest I’ve gotten to making the first move is sending a wink. All this does is alert the person that I like what I see. It took the first guy two weeks to respond. I had pretty much written him off when he sent an email, I responded, phone numbers were exchanged. And then he calls on Tuesday at 9:30 in the morning. What?!? I couldn’t answer because like most people who work full time, I was at work. I returned his call later that evening, left a voice message and have yet to hear back from him. WTF?

The second guy responded immediately with a wink. No message, just a wink. I was thinking man, why don’t these guys make a move? But, about an hour later he did, and sent me an email saying he was impressed with my profile and would like to chat. I provided him with my personal email address, which I can access during the day from work, and my number and told him I was looking forward to getting to know him better. And do you know how the ass responded? He sent me his email address and number and said keep in touch. WTF?

I. Will. Not.

I do know that I need to put forth some effort and go after what I want and I'm working on that. But have men been so spoiled by overly aggressive women that they’ve gotten lazy?

Being a member of an online dating site doesn’t change the fact that I want to be pursued. But preferably by a rich, hot, tall, good-looking man, with a great personality and sense of humor.

Is that too much to ask for?

—TOL

Not good

Warning: this post is being written during a flare up of my chronic bitchitis*

I suck.

I suck hard.

I’ve gained three pounds since last week.

And I suck because I knew it was going to happen and didn’t do anything to prevent or even minimize it.

Exercise? Huh, what’s that?

And I’ve been eating like a pig. Stuffing my face.

As I write I’m surrounded by nilla wafers, gummi bears and Hershey’s kisses.

I finished a Smartones meal and decided to take a walk to get some fresh air. Well, I ran into a co-worker on the elevator and got to talking and ended up right in front of the snack shop where I went in and proceeded to buy a bunch of snacks, then instead of going on a walk, came back to my desk and started munching.

Ahhh!

I need to pull it together.


*Bitchitis: A non life threatening disease which causes a person to act extremely bitchy. Symptoms include complaining, moodiness, short temper, having a sucky attitude, loss of sense of humor, heightened sensitivity, i.e. emotional basket case. Symptoms may be exacerbated by a visit from Aunt Flo.

—TOL

What? Really?

First, thanks to everyone for your lovely birthday wishes! I had a great weekend!

(Yes I'm the girl who never, ever celebrates just once. I mean, my birthday only rolls around once a year, may as well make the most of it.)

Two dates, a GNO and a day to recoup on Monday. Awesome!

Second, the amazing thing is that I'm two pounds lighter than last week's weigh in. So, either the weight I gained was water bloat from all the beer, the birthday weekend gorging hasn't caught up to me yet (please refer to GNO above), or my body just does whatever the hell it wants, which would explain why I'm not making much progress in my weight loss battle...sigh.



And, I've got nothin' new to report on the dating front....double sigh.



-TOL

Is this a Joke?

So the internet dating thing provides me with lots of laughs.

I thought I’d share with you, one of the so sad it’s funny funnier emails I’ve received:

Look you are the only one that i could wright to so i hope this goes some where like atlease being friends. I'm ready for a relationship it's just find that right woman to be the one that i would always look up to no matter what. The ups an downs in a relationship help build one very strong. Hope to here from you soon. My yahoo address is xxxx82 @talkmatch.com. 1


I’ll admit, I laughed out loud after reading the first line. “Look you are the only one that I could wright to.”

Way to charm me buddy.

I mean, he’s not “wrighting” to me because he finds me incredibly funny, or beautiful, or because he wants to, but because I’m pretty much his only option.

Great, because I don’t love feeling special at all.

As you can see the next three sentences are just a mess. Such a mess they actually made me feel a little bad for the dumb schmuck poor guy.

And then he signs off with the wrong email address because if this were truly his yahoo address, I’m pretty sure it would end in @yahoo.com. But maybe, I’m wrong, doubt it, but hey.

And just in case you’re curious, me and mr.-should-have-someone-proof-all-his-writing-before-making-contact-with-a-potential-date are not “atlease” friends.

—TOL

1. Name has been blocked to protect his stupidity.

It's Been A Loooooong Time

Since I posted here.

Coupla reasons.

First, I'm busy as crap right now. It's summer, the dudes are home (and all up in my grill), and I have like a billion (that's for you TOL) other blogs and articles and stuff to write.

Second, this blog seems to work just fine w/o my input. TOL does an awesome job writing and posting and keeping us all entertained with her adventures in man hunting. Plus, and this will lead to my third reason, she has plenty to say about her weight loss battle.

Third, and probably most importantly, I've got nothin'. Nothin' good, nothin' bad... nothin'. I try not to think about my fatness any more than I have to (which, since the dudes are in swim class right now and I spend a ridiculous amount of time around the pool which is staffed by a number of smoking-hot-for-a-fifteen-year-old-are-you-sure-you're-not-20 teeny boppers, is way more than say, last week).

I am basically on a eat what I want, avoid the scale, and try to exercise it off weight loss plan.

So how's that working for me?

It's probably not, but since I've been quite effective at number two, avoiding the scale, my clothes don't seem to be getting tighter, and I'm happy, I can honestly say I don't freakin' care.

I enjoyed about 12 cupcakes this past weekend (that holiday again), and I will be trying to swim in some chocolate for TOL's bday, so I really can not say that I am hugely concerned with my "plan" at the moment.

Besides, someone gave me a compliment at the pool (you know, one of those awkward ones where she was trying to appreciate my new look without acknowledging that I was disgusting before. I just wanted to say, "I get it! I was fat, and nasty, and jiggly, and gross! And, I looked like crap! Just say it already." But, I let her stumble around, and then I finally let her off with a "thank you".).

Which means that I will be fully enjoying my week off (which has turned into more like a month), and will try to try again after TOL's big day.

Hope all of you are faring better:)! -3T

Ahhh!

I fell off the wagon and am being dragged through the dirt behind it.

I gained three pounds.

Go figure. What else is new?

I consumed a couple a lot of beer over the weekend (Happy birthday America!)

And will partake in more celebrating this weekend (Happy birthday to me!)

I’ll let you know how it goes.

Hometown date

What’s in a Name broke the asking me out for Sunday lunch date tradition. Instead, he asked if I would meet him in NORTH CAROLINA for the day. (That’s where he’ll be this weekend.)

And in case you don’t know, I live in Maryland.

Yeah, he’s willing to buy me a plane ticket to spend the day with him. What is this? I’m I secretly on the Bachelorette? Who offers up a hometown date this soon?

If I were a daring person I probably would’ve taken him up on the offer. Unfortunately for him, I am not. I’m the no-need-to-pick-me-up-I’ll-meet-you-there-because-I-met-you-on-the-internet-and-you-might-kill-me kinda girl.

Now, if he were offering up Jamaica, I may have jetted off.

Of course, BFF was urging me to go just for story’s sake. I’m happy enough using the offer as my “story.”


—TOL